"Just a Stone's Throw to Winter"
Way to screw it up, Sorata.
I was hoping that after last episode's declaration, Sorata would know exactly what was up with Mashiro, regardless of how he felt about it. Instead, we got the classical romcom obliviousness, and to be honest it drove me
mad. Mashiro was as clear as she could be after what happened last time, and she was obviously
looking for Sorata's attention all through this episode. It was as if the confession never happened; Sorata had no clue why Mashiro suddenly wanted to change. What's worse is that he selfishly hoped for her to stay the way she was before because it made him uneasy to see her be a normal girl rather than an eccentric artist. He has no obligation to love Mashiro back, of course, but the problem is that he
does feel something for her, and that he's using her talent as a shield to keep his feelings at bay, and to protect himself from letting her burn him up. I'm reminded quite a bit of the story of
Icarus when I think of Mashiro and Sorata; metaphorically, Mashiro is the sun, something so bright and intense that one can't help but want to fly as close to it as possible. However, we all know how that story ends, and if Sorata is Icarus, then getting too close to Mashiro is just as dangerous as flying toward the sun with wax wings. Like Rita before him, Sorata can sense the problems Mashiro poses for his self esteem approaching, and if he's going to be destroyed, he'd much rather it were by someone trying their best than by someone half-heartedly following her dreams.
Of course things aren't quite that simple either. Sorata is falling prey to the same jealousy that had a hold on Rita. He's starting to think that if he's doomed to failure, then it's the responsibility of those who succeed to do their utmost for the rest. But his brand of reasoning is selfish; his obliviousness aside, he has no right to dictate what Mashiro should or shouldn't be doing with her life. If she wants to paint she should paint. If she wants to draw manga then by all means let her draw manga. If she wants to
learn how to cook, supervise her so that she doesn't kill anyone but let her try anyhow. Her reasons are her reasons, and it's not even as though she put off her manuscript to do it. As it is, the problem isn't even
about poor Shiina; it's about Sorata. It's his own lack of talent and the awareness of that fact that causes his self esteem to fall, and when he's rejected by the game design contest he merely lets out his anger and frustration on the first moving target he sees (and unfortunately she happens to be a worse insult to his pride).
No matter his reasoning though, Sorata is a royal
jerk for treating Mashiro the way he does, and even worse for being oblivious to her obvious feelings for him (when have you ever seen her be
that emotional before, or say things like "get out of me!" in a non-misunderstanding situation?). To me the cake here was that after that fight between them, Sorata callously
agreed to go out with Nanami on Christmas Eve. That's an insult to both Mashiro and Nanami's feelings, even if Sorata is blind to their affections, and it's plain mean of him, knowing that Mashiro is holed up in her room, depressed, after what he did to her. I know that next week we're poised for the classical "which girl will he go out with for Christmas" romcom episode, but, so help me, if he doesn't come back to Mashiro and put things right by the end of it, I will have some angry letters to write to the author. Also, that call from the little sister was ominous; let's hope she stays out of this for now.
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